No matter how old my children are...
No matter how far away they live from me...
No matter what…
I ALWAYS have purpose in my God-given role in my Primary Ministry of being a mom to my three amazing children!
There have been times in my life when I felt like everything had been turned upside down while turning me inside out! It is good to know that there are certain stabilizing things that God has put into my life and your life to remind both of us of who we are, Who’s we are, and the purpose we serve. YES even in times of chaos we have a purpose, and when we function in it we can bring stability, love, joy, and peace to our family and those around us!
I am talking about our God-given roles in our Primary Ministry! The roles that we have (daughter, sister, wife, mom, grandma) suggest purpose and function for us to move in. When we know our role, we can begin to do the things that are needed to bring about a good outcome!
As a wife and mom, I have found it holds true that where there is CHAOS - there is a deep desire for PEACE, and order is one thing that I know brings peace! Even though my children live in their own homes and have families of their own now, a daily structure is something that I have taught them and benefitted from myself over the years. I continue to use this structure as guide for myself, my husband, my children, and now my grandchildren through those unpredictable and bumpy times that can be overwhelming!
Here are 3 simple things you can do to protect the peace in your home:
Make a PLAN when and where you can
I have found that when there is a basic structure or plan for each day there is more productivity. I know what needs to be done and the children know what is expected of them. It helps them to have ownership in the responsibilities and opportunities for rewards!
Identify and Protect your PRIORITIES more than the TASKS
When I am faced with obstacles and distractions that threaten to upset the structure or plan for the day, I know that it will disrupt my peace and the peace in my home. I learned the value of protecting my priorities and found that most of the time the tasks could be put off until tomorrow.
Create Efficient Shortcuts
I learned to get creative with easy shortcuts to avoid things that could steal my time…or my sanity!
-Use a planner to keep all appointments.
-Load the dishwasher with forks, spoons, knives, in their own compartments to empty quickly into the silverware drawer. Place plates/bowls in the same row that they are stacked in the cupboard.
-Set clothes out for the next day at bedtime.
-Set the table for breakfast before going to bed; set the table for lunch after breakfast; set the table for supper after lunch.
-Meal planning (Breakfast, Lunch, Supper, Snacks) with a grocery list.
-Color coded hangers and laundry baskets for each person; color coded pencils, folders, erasers, and notebooks.
-Everything has a place, and needs to be put back in that place when finished with it.
-Shoe baskets at the doors - sock feet only in the house to keep carpets clean longer!
What Creative Shortcuts can you share?
(Email them to me: firstname.lastname@example.org)
This structure was put to the test when I got a call from our very pregnant daughter, Tara, at 4:45 am a couple of weeks ago! So I started by calling MY MOM who was going with me to help take care of her children. I told mom, “Tara just called. We need to get on the road as soon as possible! Tara is in labor!”
By 7:30 am, we were in the car for six hours, which seemed like an eternity, but finally arrived safely. We were greeted with hugs and kisses that already made the trip worth it!
For the next several days, my mom and I would be the “MOMS” to help take care of Tara and Kyle’s three children and home. When they returned from the hospital with the baby, we would help take care of them too!
I had already asked Tara for her basic schedule for each day and implemented her structure. I was determined to honor her and Kyle by keeping it, and give the children stability by not throwing them into more change! However, the “Grandma” boundaries were tested too and we had to meet those challenges with grace!
I talked with Tara about what the priorities of each day were. Then me, my mom, and the kids found ways to work together, help each other, and enjoy making the most of the moments while we got things done!
I paid close attention to ways that I could help Tara adapt her structure using shortcuts to keep things orderly and meet her need for peace during her recovery.
After eleven days we were saying our good-byes to Tara, Kyle, and their four beautiful children (the youngest now only 9 days old). Tara hugged me and thanked me for coming to help, I kissed my daughter on the cheek and said,
“You never stop being a mom! After all these years, I am still doing my Primary Ministry and loving it! One day you will do the same for your children...MOM!”