• Brenda Schaefer

THE EYES HAVE IT!



A couple of weeks ago, Scott and I decided to move my office to a bright room in our lower level. For those of you that have changed rooms for any reason, know that is code for, “TIME to go through things”! Some of those things will be given away, repurposed, or thrown away! As I started sorting, I began to remember different times, places, and reasons for keeping so many files, teachings, and special stories. Some made me laugh out loud, some made me smile, some made me think, and others brought a tear to my eye! I came across this one from 2011 and I was touched by it because of its truth. Here is this sweet story that might help us as women understand something more of God’s purpose in creating woman!


A little boy asked his mother, 'Why are you crying?'

'Because I'm a woman,' she told him.

'I don't understand,' he said.

His mom just hugged him and said, 'And you never will.'

Later the little boy asked his father, 'Why does mom seem to cry for no reason?'

'All women cry for no reason,' was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he prayed to God, and asked,

'God, why do women cry so easily?'

God said:

'When I made the woman she had to be special.

I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and ALL circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly !

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strength and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.

And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.'

'You see my son,' said God, 'the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart- the place where love resides.'


As I read this, I was reminded of different times in my own life when I would find myself unable to stop tears and sobs - sometimes without a reason! Maybe you can remember a time that you, your mother, or grandmother experienced this “Ministry of Tears”. I once heard that, “Tears wash the windows of our soul!” I believe there is truth in that statement because I always felt exhausted but better on the other side of them recognizing that I was enabled to:


-pray with an appreciation and gratitude for the ability to feel and express that

-have a clearer perspective in the struggle

-experience a deeper rest from the emotional release

-help others with deeper compassion for moments they experience like this


The next time that you feel those tears coming like water that is going to crash over the wall of a dam and can’t be held back, I want to encourage you to:


1) Let them flow!

Let those tears wash over your thoughts, will, and emotions and give you a clearer view of the goodness of God.


2) Rest in God’s presence!

That release was given to you to find a deep and refreshing rest in Him. Listen for His voice and what He is saying to you personally!


3) Pay attention!

God will give you opportunities to show compassion to others. Be alert and pray for His guidance when you have unknown opportunities to show His love to others.


The good Lord knows that I am an “ugly” cry-er!

My eyes will swell and the whites of them become bloodshot!

My nose and my lips turn bright red and swell as though they are one orifice!

My neck turns several different shades of bluish-red based on the intensity of the flood of tears and how hard I have choked them back!

My facial distortions are scarier than some of the scariest Halloween masks I have ever seen!

And the sounds that come out of my mouth from the depth of my gut terrify everyone in a one mile radius - including me!


According to this story, THE EYES HAVE IT! God says:

“The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart- the place where love resides.”


It makes me happy and thankful that true beauty and true love are much deeper than what we look like!







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